Do you ever wonder if you actually suck and are highly inappropriate without knowing it? Most days, I feel like my normal awesome self. Today, I am starting to wonder.
First, I had my bad encounter with the judgemental parent of my shiney new dating partner. The new boyfriend's dad works part-time at the church. Today was our first awkward, light conversation with the undertones of "I'm dating your son."
He glanced at my left boob while talking. It may have been the fat part of my arm. Both were at his eye level. It wasn't an embarrassed look, but one of judgement. Toward the end of the conversation was the awkward pause and fake smile. He excused himself quickly.
Yup. He hates me. It made me feel like a non-verbal conversation from one adult to another saying "You dirty woman. Quit dating my very young and innocent son."
When you add that to the quiet looks of judgement I get from my boss, the pastor, I left work today feeling dirty and inappropriate. The new boyfriend hasn't even touched my boobs!
I also wondered about my appropriateness in the world after two conversations with divinity students who are much younger than me. Did you know that it is a sin to masturbate? It is an even bigger sin to encourage it as an alternative to premature marriage. Younger people don't see the brilliance behind buying 18 year-olds vibrators. They looked at me like......well, like my new boyfriend's dad looked at me.
First, I had my bad encounter with the judgemental parent of my shiney new dating partner. The new boyfriend's dad works part-time at the church. Today was our first awkward, light conversation with the undertones of "I'm dating your son."
He glanced at my left boob while talking. It may have been the fat part of my arm. Both were at his eye level. It wasn't an embarrassed look, but one of judgement. Toward the end of the conversation was the awkward pause and fake smile. He excused himself quickly.
Yup. He hates me. It made me feel like a non-verbal conversation from one adult to another saying "You dirty woman. Quit dating my very young and innocent son."
When you add that to the quiet looks of judgement I get from my boss, the pastor, I left work today feeling dirty and inappropriate. The new boyfriend hasn't even touched my boobs!
I also wondered about my appropriateness in the world after two conversations with divinity students who are much younger than me. Did you know that it is a sin to masturbate? It is an even bigger sin to encourage it as an alternative to premature marriage. Younger people don't see the brilliance behind buying 18 year-olds vibrators. They looked at me like......well, like my new boyfriend's dad looked at me.
The only course of action after a day like today was to fry some chicken, drink a beer, and sit covered in grease hating myself. That is the most rational response.
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