Ode to 32

I haven't posted much lately. It is sad. Why do I have little to say when I am not dating? In order to break this sadness, here is my ode to 32...

Why I like being 32:

I have a lot more fun being me. At some point in the last year, I became comfortable being silly, sad, happy, somber or however I want to be without feeling awkward. I enjoy kids a lot more because I'm not busy thinking about myself and my need to be cool while interacting with them.

Why I don't like being 32:

I am now painfully aware that if I want babies to come out of my stomach, I have to find the love of my life in the next 3-5 years. That is a lot of pressure. I'm not interested in dating right now. Even when I date like a whore, no relationship lasts longer than 3 weeks. Tick, tick, tick.

Why I like being 32:

I have a house full of stuff and it is all mine. I know where the nice china is, what groceries I need every week, where my messes are hidden (like behind every cabinet and door), and which sheets are best for winter. It is my home. And I own it...or at least 1/100th of it.

Why I don't like being 32:

I live alone, which means that there is no one else that I should clean for, cook for, or put my jeans back in the closet for. I am not old enough to be motivated to do these things on my own. I am old enough to be annoyed by it.

Why I like being 32:

I have recipes which are now "mine" and I can cook my own comfort food. All the spices are waiting in my cabinet and I can grab them without thinking. My freezer is full of frozen leftover soups and sauces for future dinners. People now ask me for recipes!

Why I don't like being 32:

I actually feel like crap when I eat crap. While it would be easy to eat pizza and fast food all the time, I pay the price if I do. If I eat too much sodium, fried food, grease, or starch I feel achy and tired. Damn.

Why I like being 32:

I know what looks good on me and what doesn't. Shopping is a much faster process because I can spot what won't work for my body type from yards away! This is also a golden age when you can get away with all kinds of style from funky to prudish. Half the world thinks you are ancient and the other half thinks you are a baby. Wear what the hell you want to wear!

Why I don't like being 32:

At this very minute, I have a lot of zits, gray hair, crazy hormones, newly found spider veins, and the beginning of wrinkles. That is wrong. We should have one or the other...not everything at once.

Why I like being 32:

I have excellent credit. This means that I've been a grown-up long enough to be a respectable member of society. I got a used car loan at 2.5%! Used! (this also means that I have a lot of debt, but we don't need to dwell on that)

I also have a great dog. I've had her for years now, so we live comfortably together. She isn't new and exciting like a college kid getting their first dog. She also isn't old and pitiful like our childhood dogs. We are equally wounded, still learning, and loveable. A good dog is a wonderful help while figuring out your 30's!

The end!